Shakedowns - April 30, 2010

Virginia prisons are required to have twice yearly "shakedowns".  The simplest way to explain a shakedown is imagine allowing someone to come into your living area and turn over everything you own or possess and make sure you don't have too much of one thing (say more than 6 pairs of boxers) or you have illegal things (say a plastic knife to cut cheese or pepperoni).  Everything an inmate owns or possesses is controlled, inventoried and limited. Shakedowns are the prison's way of ensuring there is nothing present that shouldn't be there. 

But remember, this is a level 2 (low custody) facility so the real important items to be found -- like weapons -- aren't present here.  The closest this place comes to "dangerous items" are the hand-made tattoo guns and a cheese grater (which was made from a soda can and very effective at grating block cheese lifted from the kitchen). 

During shakedown -- which lasts a week -- the entire camp comes to a halt.  With the exception of kitchen inmate workers, everyone else is off work.  School and library closed; outdoor rec, cancelled; college classes, not held.  Inmates lie around their bunks, wait to be called to meals and watch TV, read, or sleep.  Meanwhile, double shifts of corrections officers are called in (to sweep one 96 man building side and include body search -- another hi-light of any man's day -- takes approximately 4 hours).  With six full size double buildings and a seventh half building, plus school, factory, rec yards and kitchen, the officers work overtime each day to ensure the search is completed within a week.  The results:  a couple of "contraband" charges written for inmates possessing more than 3 state shirts or jeans.

Why so little to show for the shakedowns?  Why don't drugs turn up (yes drugs get smuggled in at visitation even though inmates get a full naked exam leaving visits -- it's amazing where guys can hide a couple of joints or pills!)?  The reason is simply that everyone knows the shakedown is coming.  Paul Revere and the minute men had nothing on the communication system in prison.   Guys going to 6:00 am pill call see additional officers coming through the gate and the word gets out.  Before breakfast the trash can is full of illegal porn, extra clothing and shoes, homemade tools, you name it.  On top of that, guys have a thousand different places to hide the important things -- the plastic knives, cigarettes (VA prisons went tobacco free on February 1st this year; there's plenty of tobacco still around and a pack of Newports -- inmates' cigarette of choice -- is currently going for over $75).

Not that they would ever ask me, but how is this for an idea -- do away with the "mandatory" building searches; make them random.  Oh yeah, and ease up on the anal rules about what an inmate can and can't possess.  Having a rule that limits a guy to 6 pair of underwear is plain dumb; limiting his book holdings or CD holdings to 12 makes no sense.  Have rules involving serious things -- weapons and drugs -- and forget the petty BS.  And above all keep the camp open.  Nothing breeds more rebellion, more scams, more hustles than keeping guys from work and rec.

Prisons suck, but most guys here deserve to be here (not for the length of the sentence they got however).  Prisons need to be better run, more humane, and stupidity needs to be put aside or you might as well keep a revolving door at the front because guys will keep ending up back here.  Prisons are not run by smart people.  We need compassion and intelligence to make prisons turn out reformed men (and women).  I've got a sober message for you from the inside -- PRISONS ARE MAKING CRIME PAY; society is losing the war and the price for the loss is staggering.