One of the most amazing things about being locked up is the discovery of the ingenuity of the inmates. Obviously, inmates have limited resources and have to make do with whatever they can scrounge up – by beg, borrowing, or in most cases, stealing – items from the prison.
Take razor blades for instance. Virginia has a very strict “shave policy” in force that requires inmates to be clean shaven with the exception of mustaches. Disposable “Bic knock off” double-bladed razors are sold on commissary for 30¢ a piece. Guys have learned to break the razor head and remove the double blades. The blades are very thin and weak, but they get the job done. Imagine using a small disposable razor blade for cutting peppers and onions (taken from the chow hall), fruit (likewise snuck out of chow), pickles, cheese, meats, plus cutting articles out of magazines (or the occasional photo of a naked or near so woman). The strange thing is inmates are not allowed to have any type of file, scissors, you name it, but we can buy up to 6 razors each commissary.
Then there’s the guy Chunk met shortly after his arrival here named “Bobcat”. Bobcat was a mechanical genius. He could repair any broken item you had – electronics were his specialty. He never allowed anyone to watch him work (a major rule in prison – when you have a solid “hustle” you keep the skill details closely guarded or you’ll end up with competition (in later entries, L Rod will explain how he’s managed to operate a law firm for the inmates in here).
Virginia has specific rules prohibiting the exchange of any goods or services so Bobcat never asked to be paid for repairing something. He simply told you to “just show me some love” which was his way of telling you to determine the appropriate fee. If you went cheap on your commissary payment, you were off his “customer list”. A generous contribution and you were moved to the front of the line and extra time was taken on your repair
One thing you learn early on in your stay in prison is which guys have the skills or knowledge you need to help you survive your stay. You find out the guys who’ll do laundry, the real lawyers (and jailhouse ones as well), guys who can repair items, and guys who will make calls back to your family. Just like in those famous prison movies like “The Longest Yard” and “The Shawshank Redemption” you soon learn which inmates you can go to who can get things done.
The amazing thing about prison life is you soon realized that there are guys locked up who – if given access to the right chemicals could find a cure for cancer (or make a bomb). There are accomplished artists – self taught; artists who make tattoo guns out of adaptors or directly plug wire into a light socket. There is a thriving underground beehive of commercial enterprise going on each day here (some definitely illegal, like drugs, gambling and worse) and most of it makes life a little more bearable.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Monday, March 15, 2010
Initial Blog Entry
This is our initial blog entry. We -- "Chunk" and "L Rod" -- created this blog to provide a realistic view of prison life at a Virginia minimum security facility. We'll write about the good (what little there is), the bad, and the incredibly stupid.
Both of us are above average educated men. Our crimes aren't all that important. What is important is neither of us -- nor our families or friends -- ever believed we'd find ourselves in this situation. Both of us were arrested in 2008 and sentenced to rather lengthy sentences in 2009 (Virginia abolished parole in 1994 and requires convicted offenders to serve at minimum 85% of the sentence given). Neither of our crimes were violent, yet we both are serving sentences normally reserved for murder convictions. What we hope to accomplish with this blog is to help you, the reader, understand what happens when someone goes to prison.
Currently Virginia spends over $1 billion annually to house approximately 40,000 "offenders" (the new term of art for convicted inmates). Is that money well spent, especially considering the current Virginia assembly is dealing with a $4.2 billion biannual budget shortfall? You be the judge.
You will read things reported by us as they really occurred. We won't distort the truth. However, to protect the identities of inmates and officers, we will change people's names. We are likewise using "yard names" to conceal our identities. Candidly, the truth is ludicrous enough. We don't have to make anything up or embellish the facts.
Before we get involved with plot and characters in this soap opera, we need to let you understand a little more about our physical surroundings. There are approximately 1200 male inmates residing here at any given time. The grounds of the facility suggest a squarish and diagonally split camp with two identical halves, the East side and the West side. Ironically, these two names have gang connotations (yet gang affiliation is a major violation of prison rules).
The east side and west side are split by a wide sidewalk called the "boulevard". Smaller sidewalks break off to each housing unit on both sides of the camp. From the outside, the buildings look like a design fusion of Carl's Econo-shed and a Costco, you know, not much to look at but big enough to hold everything in one warehouse space. Each housing unit is split in half and has access doors to the respective entrance to either side "A" or "B". With the exception of one unit (that houses the "hole"), all the other housing units look exactly alike. This type of unit is called "dorm style housing" but it bears no resemblance to any college dorm you'd ever find. It is similar to a military barracks.
Upon entering the dorm, you walk into an area called the "dayroom". This space is equipped with 2 microwaves, a TV perched close to the ceiling (and controlled by officers), an ironing board, 6 round tables, a water fountain, trash cans and recycle bins. There is a raised full plexiglas windowed room called the booth, where one officer sits at all times and, using buttons, controls door flow and makes announcements. There are wall intercoms throughout the facility, but no one uses them. Men just walk up and talk through a slot in the booth wall.
The unit bathroom is accessed by means of saloon doors. Two swinging doors that look like cutting boards mounted mid-wall separate the dayroom from the bathroom. Inside the bathroom there are 3 urinals, 4 toilets, 5 sinks and 5 shower heads in an open area. There are no partitions between any urinals and only half walls separating toilets from each other. The close proximity of one urinal to another causes all sorts of problems. Men will only use the two outside urinals. You never (well, almost never) crowd into the middle urinal when both outside ones are being used. If you are alone at the urinal, you can use the middle one; however, this likewise violates prison "etiquette" if another man needs to really go. If you want to understand the complexities of using the urinals, watch "Dave Barry's Guide to Guys". He explains all the routes and maneuvers you need to follow to meet proper urinal techniques.
Then there is the metal plate above each sink that is suppose to serve as a mirror. Ironically, inmates must be clean shaven, yet shaving using these metal mirrors is like asking Stevie Wonder for driving directions.
The bunk area is set up as four rows of double bunks with an aisle between rows one and two and also three and four. Each inmate has a blue plastic chair that serves -- if in the top bunk -- as a ladder or just for a spare seat so you don't spend your entire day on your bunk. Each inmate has a locker with five shelves and underneath the bunk each inmate has a heavy metal footlocker. The area leading up toward the dayroom also contains an ice machine and two washers and dryers. . . This sounds like a great deal of space until you realize that there are 96 men living like this in an enclosed space that at its maximum, may be 4000 square feet. Noise is a constant distraction. Of the 96 men, 81 have personal TVs (inmates are suppose to use their TVs with headsets, but shouting about ball games reaches jet level).
A door at the back of the building opens the unit up to a full size outdoor basketball court. Each building (sides A and B) has its own court; each 3 buildings (west side and east side) share a large rec yard with a 1/3 mile gravel track, free weights, horseshoes, softball, soccer field and volleyball court.
There are 4 high watch towers at each corner of the camp much as you see on any prison TV show. Here, however, they aren't even staffed. This is a minimum security prison and the budget is tight, so they are short on officers and don't see the need to even police the camp from the towers. They do have a truck that drives slowly around the perimeter of the camp 24 hours a day.
That is life in our dorm, the physical aspects anyway.
Thanks for your interest.
Check back in a week or so for another update. We guarantee you won't believe stuff like this really happens!
Both of us are above average educated men. Our crimes aren't all that important. What is important is neither of us -- nor our families or friends -- ever believed we'd find ourselves in this situation. Both of us were arrested in 2008 and sentenced to rather lengthy sentences in 2009 (Virginia abolished parole in 1994 and requires convicted offenders to serve at minimum 85% of the sentence given). Neither of our crimes were violent, yet we both are serving sentences normally reserved for murder convictions. What we hope to accomplish with this blog is to help you, the reader, understand what happens when someone goes to prison.
Currently Virginia spends over $1 billion annually to house approximately 40,000 "offenders" (the new term of art for convicted inmates). Is that money well spent, especially considering the current Virginia assembly is dealing with a $4.2 billion biannual budget shortfall? You be the judge.
You will read things reported by us as they really occurred. We won't distort the truth. However, to protect the identities of inmates and officers, we will change people's names. We are likewise using "yard names" to conceal our identities. Candidly, the truth is ludicrous enough. We don't have to make anything up or embellish the facts.
Before we get involved with plot and characters in this soap opera, we need to let you understand a little more about our physical surroundings. There are approximately 1200 male inmates residing here at any given time. The grounds of the facility suggest a squarish and diagonally split camp with two identical halves, the East side and the West side. Ironically, these two names have gang connotations (yet gang affiliation is a major violation of prison rules).
The east side and west side are split by a wide sidewalk called the "boulevard". Smaller sidewalks break off to each housing unit on both sides of the camp. From the outside, the buildings look like a design fusion of Carl's Econo-shed and a Costco, you know, not much to look at but big enough to hold everything in one warehouse space. Each housing unit is split in half and has access doors to the respective entrance to either side "A" or "B". With the exception of one unit (that houses the "hole"), all the other housing units look exactly alike. This type of unit is called "dorm style housing" but it bears no resemblance to any college dorm you'd ever find. It is similar to a military barracks.
Upon entering the dorm, you walk into an area called the "dayroom". This space is equipped with 2 microwaves, a TV perched close to the ceiling (and controlled by officers), an ironing board, 6 round tables, a water fountain, trash cans and recycle bins. There is a raised full plexiglas windowed room called the booth, where one officer sits at all times and, using buttons, controls door flow and makes announcements. There are wall intercoms throughout the facility, but no one uses them. Men just walk up and talk through a slot in the booth wall.
The unit bathroom is accessed by means of saloon doors. Two swinging doors that look like cutting boards mounted mid-wall separate the dayroom from the bathroom. Inside the bathroom there are 3 urinals, 4 toilets, 5 sinks and 5 shower heads in an open area. There are no partitions between any urinals and only half walls separating toilets from each other. The close proximity of one urinal to another causes all sorts of problems. Men will only use the two outside urinals. You never (well, almost never) crowd into the middle urinal when both outside ones are being used. If you are alone at the urinal, you can use the middle one; however, this likewise violates prison "etiquette" if another man needs to really go. If you want to understand the complexities of using the urinals, watch "Dave Barry's Guide to Guys". He explains all the routes and maneuvers you need to follow to meet proper urinal techniques.
Then there is the metal plate above each sink that is suppose to serve as a mirror. Ironically, inmates must be clean shaven, yet shaving using these metal mirrors is like asking Stevie Wonder for driving directions.
The bunk area is set up as four rows of double bunks with an aisle between rows one and two and also three and four. Each inmate has a blue plastic chair that serves -- if in the top bunk -- as a ladder or just for a spare seat so you don't spend your entire day on your bunk. Each inmate has a locker with five shelves and underneath the bunk each inmate has a heavy metal footlocker. The area leading up toward the dayroom also contains an ice machine and two washers and dryers. . . This sounds like a great deal of space until you realize that there are 96 men living like this in an enclosed space that at its maximum, may be 4000 square feet. Noise is a constant distraction. Of the 96 men, 81 have personal TVs (inmates are suppose to use their TVs with headsets, but shouting about ball games reaches jet level).
A door at the back of the building opens the unit up to a full size outdoor basketball court. Each building (sides A and B) has its own court; each 3 buildings (west side and east side) share a large rec yard with a 1/3 mile gravel track, free weights, horseshoes, softball, soccer field and volleyball court.
There are 4 high watch towers at each corner of the camp much as you see on any prison TV show. Here, however, they aren't even staffed. This is a minimum security prison and the budget is tight, so they are short on officers and don't see the need to even police the camp from the towers. They do have a truck that drives slowly around the perimeter of the camp 24 hours a day.
That is life in our dorm, the physical aspects anyway.
Thanks for your interest.
Check back in a week or so for another update. We guarantee you won't believe stuff like this really happens!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
