Birthdays, College Acceptances and Homecoming

This was an interesting week.  A few milestones were met for a couple of guys.  Thanksgiving came and went.  It’s never easy celebrating a holiday in here.  You get used to it – at least you tell yourself that – and you spend your day keeping busy so you don’t get overwhelmed with memories.

Two of the guys I’m very close to celebrated birthdays on the same day.  Craig, one of the college aides, the guy we call “the Dean” (because he’s the inmate contact to the college) turned 40.  He’s spent seven birthdays locked up; he has five more to go.  He tried to keep it quiet, didn’t want anyone to know; big mistake.  Most days, after noon count when one of the guys is ticked at an officer a tradition has developed.  We’re standing silently as the COs confirm the number and the offended guy will yell out “4A, give it up for ____.”  The building erupts with everyone shouting “F--- ____!”  Laughter then ensues.

So we’re standing, waiting, and I yell out “4A, give it up for the dean’s 40^th birthday”.  And, well you know the response, followed by cheers and real birthday wishes.  Craig – beet red just looked at me and said “I’m gonna kill you!”

My young sidekick Mike turned 34 the same day.  Mike’s been in prison since he was fifteen; nineteen years incarcerated.  He comes up for parole every year and is denied (“serious nature of the crime”.  He stabbed a man to death).  Mike has an exemplary record as an inmate, but murder, well he probably won’t get out before his mandatory parole release date which, ironically, is 30 days before my own scheduled release date.  I always tell Mike I’m pulling for him to make early parole because I’m assured of getting out a month later!

I can’t imagine doing “this” at fifteen.  He was kept at a juvenile center until 17, then shipped to “real prison”.  Back then, DOC operated a facility called Southampton.  It was for young, violent offenders:  age 17 to 30.  And, it was a zoo.  A good number of the guys I know here who are mid-thirties to 40 and who’ve been “down” 15 to 20 years started at Southampton.  Southampton was known for stabbings, rapes and drugs.  Chaos ruled.  Somehow, this quiet, tall white kid avoided it all.  He stayed to himself, avoided being a victim, avoided the gang flare ups between the Aryans and the blacks, and he got his level lowered to Lunenburg. 

When I first met Mike he was painfully quiet.  Introverted was defined by “see Mike”.  But, Craig and I saw he was bright – very bright – and we convinced him to come work in my classroom.  And, as is my habit, I talked to him (I talk to everybody).  Mike started talking.  I’ve turned him into a regular chatterbox!  He’s a great tutor, well-read, a “Seinfeld” fan, and I can count on him to hit the occasional “that’s what she said”, when needed.  Nineteen birthdays in prison; nine more to go.  He came in a teenager; he’ll head out in his forties.

Two guys who I helped with college applications received letters admitting them.  “Mouse” was notified of acceptance beginning next fall at his local community college.  He’s halfway toward his associates degree which he’ll complete while working toward a degree in culinary arts.  Then there’s Todd.  Another mid-thirties guy.  Did 5 years in Tennessee prisons and another 5 here for dealing drugs.  Todd is one of my favorite students.  He puts his all into his studies and has maintained a 4.0 GPA.  This week he learned he will finish his studies at a four-year state university after his release early next year.  He was one of the few guys who passed the IT “A+ certification” exam.  He’s going to get his degree in information technology.

I’m waiting to hear about five more guys who’ve applied to colleges next year after their release.  Imagine, going to college in here and then being able to complete your studies in a real college setting.  A college education is the number one determiner in breaking the recidivism cycle.  That these guys have a shot is remarkable.

And then there’s Solo.  Our famous “porn king” heads home Monday.  Nine year bid coming to an end.  Solo’s going home to his wife, his two kids, a job (at his family’s restaurant) and college.  Solo looks like Buddha with a bowl haircut.  He was known – back when smoking was permitted – to slow jog around the track with a honeybun in one hand and a cigarette in the other.  Solo always has a smile on his face and hardcore porn in his pocket.  He’s completed his sentence – nine years for selling powder cocaine (the deal went bad, he was stabbed in the arm severing a major artery.  He was arrested at the hospital once the police realized he wasn’t going to bleed to death).  Solo will spend Christmas with his family.  His last prison holiday behind him.

And me on Thanksgiving?  I enjoyed my meal and watched football.  Later, I ate some ramen noodles and refried beans.  I drank a ginger ale, laughed with the guys in the building and tried not to think about Thanksgivings before.  As I paused and read my afternoon devotional the words from Paul’s letter to the Thessalonians came to mind:

“Pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks….”

I realized it had been a very good, blessed week.