Missing Something

I’m up early and I can’t sleep.  When I say early, I mean its 3:30 am.  Over and over, I hear the discussion I had yesterday afternoon with two young guys in here.  Over and over, I think “how can they miss the point?”  Over and over, I wonder is it the system that made them this way or are they like this and the system just makes it worse?  Either way, I’m worried.

Empathy is defined as “understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, the feelings, thoughts and experiences of another.”  Simply put, it means getting it when someone is hurting.  I’ve written before about the millions Governor McDonnell spent investing in the “Compass” computer questionnaire which, in 120 questions, allegedly measures an inmate’s likelihood to recommit.  I say allegedly because, as with any psychological profiling tool, you can – or should – see what the proper answer is.

Our grant for IT certification uses results from the Compass test to screen candidates.  You must be “college eligible” (in other words, possess a high school diploma or GED) and you must score high on the compass recidivism risk indicator scale.  On a ten point scale you must have at least a “5”.  Most of our candidates score 8, 9, or 10.

The compass test measures self-awareness of things like personal responsibility, violent tendencies and anger issues, and empathy.  Candidates for our grant are pre-screened using their compass results.  Likewise, every inmate in the system during their annual review is tested.  Results are tracked year upon year.

I’ve taken the test two consecutive years and registered “1” both times.  In bold lettering with green color the screen indicates “low risk of re-offense” in ten measured categories.  The two young guys I spoke to both took the Compass last week as part of their annual reviews.  One is a recent grad of our IT program set to go home in October.  The other is a current student set for release next February.  Both came back with scores of “9”, highlighted in bold red.  Both, for perhaps the first time in their prison lives, were worried.  “Is this accurate?   Does it really matter?”

It does, I tell them, and here’s why. 

Typical question:  “You see a person crying.  Your initial reaction is:

(1)  Much concern

(2)  Some concern

(3)  No feeling one way or the other

(4)  Some scorn/ridicule

(5)  Much scorn/ridicule

Empathy tells you when you see a person crying, your initial reaction should be at least some concern.  Both these guys chose “4”.  So I explained to them how empathy, a “social conscience” means feeling emotionally connected to my fellow man.  Here are their responses:
“What if it’s a chick on her period?”
“What if it’s a guy acting like a bitch?”
“Why isn’t “3” the right answer?  Why should I give a shit about some guy crying?”

And I couldn’t get them to understand you care, you empathize, you feel, because we are social and we have a conscience.  They looked at me with blank stares.

Prison does not make people lack compassion, kindness, or empathy for others.  But it does allow negative, anti-social behavior to fester.  Caring, compassion, and kindness are signs of weakness in here.  They are exploited and ridiculed.  The system, rather than teaching and fostering empathy, allows just the opposite to fester and grow like a virus.  It is this highly toxic Petri dish of ignorance, and violence, and despair that takes lives in and spits them back out.  And nothing, I fear that DOC is doing, is combating the problem.

What’s the answer?  I don’t know.  I just know prison doesn’t make a person empathetic.  And without empathy our social compact cannot survive.  Ignorance and violence will win out over compassion, mercy and justice.  Something is missing.  This system is not the answer.  And I think the reason I couldn’t sleep is not because of these guys.  It’s because I realized the folks out there don’t care enough to demand more from their representatives.  No person with a social conscience can think the corrections system is just.  Maybe I’m missing something, but I don’t see much empathy to overcome this sick system.

Empathy 101

The prison’s warden, a 56 year-old African American woman, was killed in a two vehicle accident in a small town, ten miles from here, Thursday evening. At 6:00 am Friday the entire compound knew. First, the details of the accident made the morning news. Initial reports indicated the warden ran a stop sign and was struck broadside by the second vehicle. The warden was dead at the scene. The two people in the second vehicle were seriously injured.



At 6:00 am count, the day shift officers arrived with black tape on their badge. By 8:00, a memo was up in the building from the assistant warden. As with so many “Dear Offender” memos, this one also misjudged the mood of the prison population.


It began: “We regret to inform you. . .” Honestly, there weren’t a great deal of regrets being expressed around the compound.


“Maybe we’ll get chicken and ice cream tonight. . .”
“Karma’s a bitch man. . .”
“F--- her and all the cops. . .”


Harsh? Yes. Shocking to your senses? Absolutely. But, before you get indignant, consider that on the day Ms. Lewis was executed in the Virginia death chamber less than four months ago, pro-death penalty advocates applauded. Consider that it was recently reported that 70,000 Iraqi civilians were “casualties” of our nation’s war effort with little if any public remorse exhibited. I write that in embarrassment knowing I supported both the war in Afghanistan and the war in Iraq.


I pass no judgment on your view of capital punishment or use of military force. I have come full circle on both issues. My prison experience has taught me faith in God means an avoidance of violence in all forms. But that’s my view.


No, I point these things out because I’ve come to the conclusion we have become woefully lacking in empathy. We refuse to seek understanding of someone else’s feelings. “Screw them. Nobody cares how I feel.”


Guys in here use macabre humor and downright gloating when bad things happen to people they blame for their circumstances. Four cops shot in Detroit, guys cheer. Almost every inmate has a story of how the police took advantage of them. Stories of crooked police appear almost nightly in the paper. USA Today ran a series of stories on prosecutorial misconduct. Yet, guys in here continue to struggle to get their story told.


A young kid in the building showed me a picture the other night. He was at a party. There was a girl in the picture. She was obviously high and she was hanging on him. I recognized her. She has filled in here as a CO.


“I met her at Nottoway (a level 4 prison) on my last bid. She was on duty up there. I got out and started dealin’ coke. Got called to a party. Sold a lot of eight balls (3.5 grams). She saw me. I banged her for three days and kept her in coke.” He then got busted on a probation violation – dirty urine. She’s still working as a CO, eight ball and all.


There’s a senior officer here who’s had four (yes four) DUIs. He pulled no jail time and is still working here. Guys here see that and realize the system’s rigged.


Meanwhile, the people on the street demand politicians “get tough on crime”. After all, criminals aren’t good people; criminals are scum.


We live in a course, degraded world and it’s getting worse. Funny thing is prisons just mirror society. Some of the most popular magazines sell precisely because they expose our human foibles. We love when people fail. We love other’s misery. Pretty sick, yet pretty prevalent.


To guys in here the warden represents the machine that is keeping them in this hell. She represents, she controls, the officers that shake us down, strip search us, watch us urinate. Is it rational? No. But then again, neither was my glee when I heard Saddam Hussein was hung or my sentence.


Later in the day I overheard guys say “you know she wasn’t that bad a warden”. Other guys were contemplating the suddenness of her passing. “Man, when your number’s called, it’s time.” The initial jokes passed, most men thought about the “what if” in here. “What if I get a call about my family? My parents?”


Empathy is an interesting thing. You suddenly gain understanding of a person’s problems. You’re more likely to show mercy and forgive.


Two and a half years ago I thought I knew right from wrong. I was quick to pass judgment on others (quick to ignore my own sins). Then, I started meeting murderers and armed robbers. I talked to drug dealers and drug addicts. I discovered no two men were the same. I found some I grew to care deeply about. They became friends. Others I just couldn’t stand. But, I learned to listen. I learned to hear.


There is evil in the world and we should confront it and defeat it. But, we should never gloat over anyone’s suffering. At least, that’s the lesson I’ve learned in here.