Shady - May 5, 2010

There are some guys that just make an immediate impression on you.  I've met a few guys like that during my "stay" here but none quite as unique as "Shady".  He was called that because he bore a striking resemblance to white rapper Eminem.  Thirty years old with a New Orleans Saints logo tattooed on his neck, he is a repeat offender.  Locked up on and off since age seventeen, I met him a few months ago as his current sentence (probation violation) was winding down.

Shady was/is the consummate "institutionalized" offender.  Everything he did, everything he said, was to hustle you.  He projected an "I don't give a s---" exterior which masked a great fear of getting out, of being unable to survive in the real world.

He was married to a stripper (not the kind of marriage normal folks think about.  He constantly cheated on her; she was unfaithful to him; drug use and alcohol abuse was rampant).  He had an adorable little girl, being raised by his wife in a trailer with drugs and booze and different men coming through their life.  Shady accepted all that, provided his wife sent him money for commissary, which occurred less and less frequently the last few months.

He refused to get his G.E.D.  He gambled to excess daily, usually losing what little commissary he had.  He had no job.  He had attempted suicide on a number of occasions and had been hospitalized for psychiatric disorders in prior prison stays.

He became in many ways the most frustrating guy I drew close to because his potential was so great, yet his motivation was virtually nil.

He was also hilarious.  There were so many nights he had E, Big S and me rolling on the floor.  He ripped on people, made funny sounds and faces, walked with his pants sagging below his butt.

The four of us played basketball one rainy afternoon.  I may be the worst hoop player on the compound and we were bound to get our butts kicked by E and Big S, but having Shady yell instructions at me while not playing defense made the massacre even worse.

I also discovered during my friendship with Shady that he wasn't a U.S. citizen.  The issue came up innocently enough when he told me he was born in England and lived there six years before his "mum" met his step dad and brought him to the states.  He had a UK passport; never was a U.S. Citizen. 

I casually mentioned to him I thought he could be deported to England (he had extended family there and his Mom and Step dad were moving over as well).  "But I have 19 years of suspended time and probation over my head".  "Who cares", I told him.  Sure enough, a call and letter to the British Embassy and he was packed up by immigration officials when his sentence ended.  He is flying back to England courtesy of the U.S. Government in a few days.

Here's my big fear about Shady.  If he doesn't contest deportation, he'll be in England in less than a month.  The suspended time will be a thing of the past and he will have family to help and support him.  But, his stripper wife started visiting the last few weeks professing love for him.  He started thinking about going "home" to the trailer, and the drugs and the booze, and the fights, and the lack of any job opportunity.  If he does, he will end up getting picked back up within six months serving more time.

He is one of those all too numerous men in here who know more about "the system" than life on the outside.  He is both a product and the waste of the American prison system. 

Funny thing is E, Big S and I all liked Shady.  He was a great guy.  But we all realize he is and always will be an inmate.  We all had lives outside this dump.  We don't plan on ever setting foot back in here.  Shady will, as the years progress, become just a fading memory to each of us.