Do the Hustle

I hired a laundry man yesterday. Reggie, the same guy who talks to the trash cans. We have building laundrymen who do our laundry once a week (there are 2 washers and 2 driers in each building. Inmates get one wash each week with detergent provided by the prison; all other washes are on your own with your own soap).



Reggie is crazy – certifiable. But, he also does a great job on laundry and his job is in the building so he’s here all day. The only times I can get another wash in is weekends because of my schedule. So I hired Reggie to do my laundry – wash, dry, and fold – twice a week for $2.57 a month (price of one bag of coffee), plus I provide the detergent ($1.98 for an 8 load bag).


Almost every guy has a hustle – a way to earn a few extra bucks each month. I’m considered “upper-middle class” because I make the compound high 45 cents per hour. Average month I make a whopping $54.00. Housemen (the guys that clean the dorm) only make 23 cents an hour. You want to eat well from commissary, buy personal clothing (you need more than three pair of boxers!), get CD’s, you hustle.


A guy in our building – KC – used to make furniture. He needed a divorce. I handled it for him (I don’t charge for legal work. I abhor uneducated guys who “sell” jailhouse lawyering). To thank me he built me a CD case. It’s made out of cracker boxes glued one on top of the other (glue courtesy of the prison) until it forms an almost fiber board thickness. It’s sturdy, painted white, with a shelf, and holds 16 CD’s. KC sells the boxes – and all sorts of other storage containers for $5 to $20 worth of commissary. He also does handmade cards. I got a father’s day card for my dad with a perfect replica ’57 T-Bird painted on it.


There’s a guy in another building who makes jewelry – cross necklaces, bracelets, all out of wire and wood he lifts from the on site factory. There are a couple of Kitchen guys who sneak out onions, peppers, spices, fresh fruit and deliver them.


Malik has a catering business. You give him the ingredients and he’ll prepare you a pizza, calzone, apple pie.


Then there’s the illegal stuff (technically, all hustles are illegal. You can’t barter or sell any item or service). You want drugs? For the right price, you can get them. Just last week, a dealer and seven of his customers were busted with weed and pills.


Tobacco? A whole pack of Newport 100’s can be had for $75 to $100, cash. Cash on the compound? You can find it.


Sex? Just last month a gay prostitution ring was broken up in another building. The “pimp” was shipped elsewhere.


How does all this go on in prison? As recent firings and arrests of CO’s shows, with their active participation. But, what do you expect? Everyone has a weakness. A great many of the CO’s are young, uneducated, poorly paid, and poorly trained.


There’s a massive underground economy in here. Need your glasses or headphones repaired? See Miguel. Sneaker soles need re gluing? E’s the man. Need an extra blue shirt, blanket or sheets? See Ray. He’s got the laundry hook up. Want a woman? There are a couple of female CO’s who “like a man in uniform” (one guy in my building actually married a CO in prison – after she was fired for fraternizing).


This entire system is maintained by the underground economy, guys working on the side for a little “somethin”. Sounds a whole lot like the U.S. economy, doesn’t it?