Esau

This is difficult to write. I heard a minister recently give a sermon on Jacob and Esau and the bowl of stew. It quite frankly changed my outlook on so many things.



For those that aren’t familiar with the story, a little background. Abraham had Isaac. Isaac had twin sons: Esau and Jacob. Esau was the older. Isaac loved Esau. He was the outdoorsman, tough, a man’s man. Jacob was favored by his mother, Rebekah. He was smart and had more feminine traits.


Jewish culture held that the oldest son owned the family birthright. The oldest received a double share of the family’s wealth and prestige.


One day Esau returned from hunting and smelled a lentil stew Jacob was preparing. “Give me a bowl of stew, I’m starving”, cried Esau. “I’ll give you the bowl of stew for your birthright”, Jacob countered. “What good is my birthright anyway? I’m starving” thought Esau. He ate the stew and, the Bible notes; he “despised his birthright”.


Twice later in the Bible the significance of the birthright is mentioned. When God speaks to Moses and then again when Matthew describes the lineal relationship of God through his people, the order goes – God is the God “of Abraham, of Isaac and of Jacob”. Esau traded away his birthright, his order in God’s lineage for a bowl of stew.


Who would be foolish enough to trade their entire future for a bowl of stew? As I listened to the minister’s sermon I realized, sadly, I would. I did. I gave up everything that mattered for the temporary thrill of money.


Like Esau, I had everything to look forward to. I had a wonderful future mapped out. I loved and was loved by an amazing, beautiful woman. I thought I was the luckiest man alive the day I met her. She blessed our life together with two beautiful, healthy, intelligent sons.


I grew up in a family with parents who loved me deeply. They nurtured and cared for me and gave me opportunities few could even dream of.


I had scores of friends who enjoyed my company. I had my health. I was comfortable.


But, like Esau, I came in from the fields one day starving, so I thought I was. I wanted something immediately; I craved to be envied, to be held in high esteem. I wanted money and an exciting life.


I traded away my future; I traded away the love of my life; I traded away the joy I felt as I watched my two sons; I traded it away for the impulsive lure of money and pride.


I don’t know who reads my ramblings or why, but if you come across this posting and you see all that I gave up over my shortsighted impulsive action, you pause before you make the same mistake.


Desire can be a terrible thing if it causes us to lose focus on the larger context of our lives. Things, wants, only provide a temporary satiation to our appetite. What matters is love and commitment. Every time I stole, every time I lied to my soul mate, I took a bite of the stew. Yet one bite wasn’t enough. I wanted, I desired more. I threw my entire future away bite upon bite.


When I was 21, I met a beautiful young girl. For me, it was love at first sight. I knew all I wanted from my future was to be her husband, to love her and be loved by her. I knew if God blessed our union with children I would be the best father ever. Nothing mattered more to me than that. I threw that away for a lousy bowl of stew.


The most difficult thing to do when you say you love someone isn’t that you’re sorry. No, the most difficult thing is to say I love you so much I want you happy even if that means you’ll be with someone else. That’s what the bowl of stew has cost me.


I thought my situation was unique. No one could understand what I was going through. Then, I saw Esau. I don’t know what my future holds. I know what I pray for. I’m willing to patiently wait. I wish I could go back, back to that August evening when I was 21. I’d do things differently. I wouldn’t eat the stew.